Do you want to know what the problem is? I’m here to tell you.
See, I just clicked on an article and read two lines before I applied all my previously held biases, then I got bored by the end of the first paragraph and assumed everything I previously knew to be true, which is that I am correct.
My hundreds of hours of Internet research and thousands of hours lived, raised, and programmed by people who think exactly like I do have led me to this well thought out point: I have solved all the world’s problems with this post on the Facebook wall of a local news station.
Hear me out. I may not have things like experience outside my small town. I may not have “traveled”. I may not have spoken to people who don’t look or act like me except for this one guy! Oh man that guy isn’t like me at all and he loves me! He’s great and he has a girlfriend. Oh man she is from somewhere else and we get along great. I’ve passed muster now. We can talk about this. I am the authority.
Not to mention that I don’t require instruction on these matters. I’m a self-starter, just like my father and his father before him. They toiled the fields and made what they had from nothing! Absolutely nothing. They came to this wide free empty promised land and just took what they needed and made it into something. Why can’t these people do it?
I know these things to be true because I can look around and see that it is so. I have two eyes that work. I graduated high school. Sure, maybe I haven’t read a book about it, or taken a course on it, but how are you doing with that fancy college education? Go ahead and make mine a Venti. No, a Trenta! There you go, smarty pants. Why are you behind that counter and I’m over here, self-made business owner, just like my dad and his dad and his dad? Maybe I know a thing or two.
Bottom line is, guys, I’ve figured this shit out. I’m here to tell you about it and if you don’t like it go home and cry in your millennial lives matter coffee brewing panties. Just because I see something that doesn’t mesh with the other 99% of my lived experiences doesn’t mean I’m going to just change my mind. I bet you wishy washy infants go changing your mind constantly. Is that what you call learning? I call that not knowing how to be the Captain of your ship. I steer this shit straight.
Pardon my French, but it’s just how I feel. You can take it to the bank. My friends like these ideas. So do the fine readers of the KKKK News Facebook Page. Over 150 likes and growing.
Maybe I should take this wisdom to a larger audience. Maybe I should run for city council. Hell, I could be a State Representative.
Now I like the sound of that.